“It’s all in the past.”
“I’ve gotten over that.”
“It’s not that big a deal.”
“Well at least I wasn’t ________.”
“That happened a long time ago, it shouldn’t still bother me.”
Those are the kind of statements that I often hear from clients regarding their story. Is that something that you’ve ever heard yourself say? Maybe you’ve told yourself those things as a way to deal with difficult experiences, and started doing so such a long time ago that you take it as truth. But it isn’t true. The reality is that difficult childhood experiences leave a profound imprint on the heart and soul that can have significant power in the life of the child, and later the adult. The effects of trauma get stored in the brain and body, creating unconscious processes that direct your life and relationships.
- Physical, sexual, verbal and emotional abuse
- Covert sexual abuse
- Emotional and physical neglect
- Emotional and physical abandonment
- Having a parent who is an addict (alcoholic, sex addict, drug addict, workaholic, etc.)
Many people limit trauma primarily to the categories of physical or sexual abuse. That type of overt abuse is traumatic, but children also experience trauma in more covert ways. Pia Mellody, a Senior Fellow at The Meadows treatment center and an expert in childhood trauma defines trauma as experiencing “anything that is less than nurturing” from a primary caregiver. Which means that most people experienced some level of trauma in their childhood.
If you need help dealing with experiences in your past, please contact me for an appointment.